I don't generally make a big deal out of my birthday. I mark it, but almost never have a party. I might go out with a friend or friends, but if I don't do anything it's no big deal. This year was no different. In fact, the entire year felt taken over by my decision to move and the angst about that. Birthday? Who cares. Now next year, that will be another story altogether.
Next year is a Big Birthday. One that ends in a zero. And I plan to celebrate! Not only will I hang out with friends in California, but I plan to celebrate in Seattle too. The idea is to have a kind of rolling celebration; a little here, a little there. A nice, long party. Low key. And hopefully just right.
As for whether my year has turned out as I hoped it would, no, it hasn't. There was a lot I wanted to do that I didn't do for various reasons, and overall I've felt like I've been dragging myself to where I am now. I'm just tired, ready to burn my regrets in a solstice bonfire and let myself be carried into the new year.
it *is* a big birthday. I admit to trepidation. I don't want to admit to this one. Sometimes I feel every moment of it, sometimes I feel MUCH younger. Your idea is a good one. Maybe I'll be celebrating in CA next year--you've given me an idea!
ReplyDeleteIt's huge! I go back and forth between being excited and kind of horrified. It's a loaded number.
DeleteAnd yeah, sometimes I feel soooo over the hill and full of aches and pains and other days it's no different than when we were in our 20s hanging out at State. Ah, youth! Truly wasted on the young.